Jacob 3

1 BUT behold, I, Jacob, would speak unto you that are pure in heart. Look unto God with firmness of mind, and pray unto him with exceeding faith, and he will console you in your afflictions, and he will plead your cause, and send down justice upon those who seek your destruction.
2 O all ye that are pure in heart, lift up your heads and receive the pleasing word of God, and feast upon his love; for ye may, if your minds are firm, forever.
3 But, wo, wo, unto you that are not pure in heart, that are filthy this day before God; for except ye repent the land is cursed for your sakes; and the Lamanites, which are not filthy like unto you, nevertheless they are cursed with a sore cursing, shall scourge you even unto destruction.
(Book of Mormon | Jacob 3:1 - 3)

I felt like Jacob was praying upon my vanity here. As he said, he's speaking to the pure in heart, I almost quit reading, because--well--I don't feel so pure in heart. But then, I continued reading, thinking...I'm not so bad...maybe this message could apply to me, and WHAM!! For those of you reading who are not really pure in heart, you better repent or the whole land is cursed just to punish you, and so the pure are being punished along with you---how does that make you feel?

10 Wherefore, ye shall remember your children, how that ye have grieved their hearts because of the example that ye have set before them; and also, remember that ye may, because of your filthiness, bring your children unto destruction, and their sins be heaped upon your heads at the last day.
(Book of Mormon | Jacob 3:10)

OK, OK, so I need to do better in raising my children. What kind of example have I been? When they are adults, are they going to excuse themselves when they do wrong, or will they fess up and apologize. I keep feeling like the moral lessons I try to teach are just not sinking in. Am I not a good enough example? Don't get me wrong, I have very good kids. But, sometimes, I worry that I'm sending the wrong message. There's such a fine line between teaching good behavior and being intolerant of childhood. I wish I could walk it better.

Jacob 2

4 For behold, as yet, ye have been obedient unto the word of the Lord, which I have given unto you.
5 But behold, hearken ye unto me, and know that by the help of the all–powerful Creator of heaven and earth I can tell you concerning your thoughts, how that ye are beginning to labor in sin, which sin appeareth very abominable unto me, yea, and abominable unto God.

(Book of Mormon | Jacob 2:4 - 5)

So, far, you've been good. You know it & I know it, but it's your thoughts that worry me. Change begins in the mind. All things are created spiritually first, God shows this in the scriptures when he creates the Earth. We follow the same path...our creations begin in our mind. So, if we can learn to control our minds, we can control ourselves.

35 Behold, ye have done greater iniquities than the Lamanites, our brethren. Ye have broken the hearts of your tender wives, and lost the confidence of your children, because of your bad examples before them; and the sobbings of their hearts ascend up to God against you. And because of the strictness of the word of God, which cometh down against you, many hearts died, pierced with deep wounds.

(Book of Mormon | Jacob 2:35)

I've read this before, but today it really struck within me the importance of family--caring for, supporting & trusting. If you remember, the Lamanites were bloodthirsty, godless people. But the Nephites here have done worse--they've cheated on their spouses, broken their children's hearts. Hmmm, and the world today wonders why immorality is so bad. I actually had to explain to a friend the other day WHY pornography wasn't a good outlet for her teen--had she never thought of its addictiveness? How he would treat his future wife? People's higher inclination to cheat on a spouse after seeing the stuff? How can we be so blind?

Jacob 1

I decided to move forward, rather than back. I thought it might give me more motivation.
2 And he gave me, Jacob, a commandment that I should write upon these plates a few of the things which I considered to be most precious; that I should not touch, save it were lightly, concerning the history of this people which are called the people of Nephi.

(Book of Mormon | Jacob 1:2)

So, this book will be what Jacob considered most precious about the gospel. Not history stuff. Considering how they had to write back then, it must have been EXTREMELY precious.

5 For because of faith and great anxiety, it truly had been made manifest unto us concerning our people, what things should happen unto them.
6 And we also had many revelations, and the spirit of much prophecy; wherefore, we knew of Christ and his kingdom, which should come.

(Book of Mormon | Jacob 1:5 - 6)

Interesting that he said "We" had the revelations. I'm assuming he and Nephi. This gives a little more credence to what he's trying to say. They both had the revelations, he's just writing them down. It's not just his thought process, this came from God.

10 The people having loved Nephi exceedingly, he having been a great protector for them, having wielded the sword of Laban in their defence, and having labored in all his days for their welfare—
11 Wherefore, the people were desirous to retain in remembrance his name. And whoso should reign in his stead were called by the people, second Nephi, third Nephi, and so forth, according to the reigns of the kings; and thus they were called by the people, let them be of whatever name they would.
12 And it came to pass that Nephi died.

(Book of Mormon | Jacob 1:10 - 12)

This section helps me understand why there are 3 Nephi, 4 Nephi and such. These men might have had a different name when born, but had to take on the name of Nephi as ruler.

19 And we did magnify our office unto the Lord, taking upon us the responsibility, answering the sins of the people upon our own heads if we did not teach them the word of God with all diligence; wherefore, by laboring with our might their blood might not come upon our garments; otherwise their blood would come upon our garments, and we would not be found spotless at the last day.

(Book of Mormon | Jacob 1:19)

I still have a hard time laboring among the people to teach them over and over again about salvation. I suppose I'm not Christlike in that I dislike having to even have callings in our church that check in on how people are doing, and ask them if they need help, or bringing them lessons of Christ to remind them of his teachings. I often feel as though, if people want to hear of Christ, they'll come to church. Leave them alone! HOWEVER, whenever I read the scriptures, I am often reminded that those who have been called of God to take care of people need to go out and teach the gospel and bring them unto Christ. I know that there have been people grateful for someone called of God showing up on their doorstep and bringing the gospel to them. I suppose I often feel like Jonah--"Do I HAVE to? Does my husband HAVE to? Can't we stay home and mind our own business? " I know that, in my heart, that is NOT what the scriptures teach, but it is still how I act. I suppose that is something I can work on.
Time for another sidebar goal? I suppose...

2 Nephi 33

Whew! I made progress! This is the last chapter of 2Nephi. Perhaps I'll backtrack and read 1Nephi next...or maybe I'll go on and read Jacob. I'll decide tomorrow. Yes, I really do plan on doing this again this week!

1 AND now I, Nephi, cannot write all the things which were taught among my people; neither am I mighty in writing, like unto speaking; for when a man speaketh by the power of the Holy Ghost the power of the Holy Ghost carrieth it unto the hearts of the children of men.
(Book of Mormon | 2 Nephi 33:1)

When I read this verse, I was reminded of a time when I'd barely learned the scriptures. I'd barely started believing in them, but I was convinced that the Book of Mormon was as true as the Bible (if not more so, considering all the times the Bible has been translated...have you ever played the game telephone at a party? Think of how funny that is, now...it's not so funny when played with a scripture that your salvation could ride on, is it?)
Anyhow, I was reminded of a time when a friend of mine asked me a question, and even though I hadn't read much, nor did I KNOW much, the answers just came out of my mouth. I was learning right along with her! Could I ever write down what I said? No. Once the spirit was done talking to her, I could barely remember the gist of what I'd communicated. Sigh. So much good information.

10 And now, my beloved brethren, and also Jew, and all ye ends of the earth, hearken unto these words and believe in Christ; and if ye believe not in these words believe in Christ. And if ye shall believe in Christ ye will believe in these words, for they are the words of Christ, and he hath given them unto me; and they teach all men that they should do good.
11 And if they are not the words of Christ, judge ye—for Christ will show unto you, with power and great glory, that they are his words, at the last day; and you and I shall stand face to face before his bar; and ye shall know that I have been commanded of him to write these things, notwithstanding my weakness.
12 And I pray the Father in the name of Christ that many of us, if not all, may be saved in his kingdom at that great and last day.
(Book of Mormon | 2 Nephi 33:10 - 12)

The Prophet, President Gordon Bitner Hinckley, was once asked what he thought of the Baptist convention coming to Salt Lake City, UT (known "home of the Mormons" I'd suppose you'd say). His response was brilliant, and I was glad to be able to hear it first hand, not just read it in the paper or hear others tell me about it. He answered that he had some friends who had not accepted the Book of Mormon as scripture, and he'd love to send them over to the convention to learn of Christ, because they at least needed Christ in their lives. Christ is the important part, BUT we must remember that merely believing doesn't show him our love. Christ himself said, "If ye love me, keep my commandments." Which means, we must do as he has asked us, even if we don't understand why.

2 Nephi 32

1 AND now, behold, my beloved brethren, I suppose that ye ponder somewhat in your hearts concerning that which ye should do after ye have entered in by the way. But, behold, why do ye ponder these things in your hearts?
2 Do ye not remember that I said unto you that after ye had received the Holy Ghost ye could speak with the tongue of angels? And now, how could ye speak with the tongue of angels save it were by the Holy Ghost?
3 Angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost; wherefore, they speak the words of Christ. Wherefore, I said unto you, feast upon the words of Christ; for behold, the words of Christ will tell you all things what ye should do.
4 Wherefore, now after I have spoken these words, if ye cannot understand them it will be because ye ask not, neither do ye knock; wherefore, ye are not brought into the light, but must perish in the dark.
5 For behold, again I say unto you that if ye will enter in by the way, and receive the Holy Ghost, it will show unto you all things what ye should do.
6 Behold, this is the doctrine of Christ, and there will be no more doctrine given until after he shall manifest himself unto you in the flesh. And when he shall manifest himself unto you in the flesh, the things which he shall say unto you shall ye observe to do.
7 And now I, Nephi, cannot say more; the Spirit stoppeth mine utterance, and I am left to mourn because of the unbelief, and the wickedness, and the ignorance, and the stiffneckedness of men; for they will not search knowledge, nor understand great knowledge, when it is given unto them in plainness, even as plain as word can be.
8 And now, my beloved brethren, I perceive that ye ponder still in your hearts; and it grieveth me that I must speak concerning this thing. For if ye would hearken unto the Spirit which teacheth a man to pray ye would know that ye must pray; for the evil spirit teacheth not a man to pray, but teacheth him that he must not pray.
9 But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul.
(Book of Mormon | 2 Nephi 32:1 - 9)

The scriptures speak volumes to me, perhaps this is why I put off reading them. It may sound silly, but do you ever feel like you're just tired of learning more because the more you study & pray, the more different the world feels (like you're just not a part of it as much?) and then you feel like an outsider, with nowhere to turn, not even church because then you feel like commenting, and people look at you funny, so you keep your mouth shut, and then you are miserable, and then...AARG! Therefore, my scripture reading goes in spurts. I do well until I feel like I'm learning too much, then I back off. Silly me. Maybe someday I'll push through and just learn all I should.

Now, as for these verses, I feel chastised. I've applied to enroll my children in a Montessori school. I've also looked into homeschooling, and did Kindergarten here at home this year with Zach. I keep going back and forth over if I'll actually send them to school. You know what? I have NOT prayed about it. I keep meaning to, and keep putting it off! I'm putting off knowing what to do to best raise my children! Their future is depending on their past, and I'm not seeking inspiration. What am I thinking?!?

I sit and I ponder things, but I don't bring them to God. I wonder what our family's future will be like, but I don't bring it to God. I say trite & trivial things like, "Thanks for a happy day, bless me to get some sleep." AND then I leave out the important stuff that I plague my mind with all day. I should be asking him what to do, putting it in his hands and then pressing forward without worry! So, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to go unload on the Lord, take up HIS yoke, and make my burdens lighter.

Too Long & 2 Nephi 31

Honestly, my husband and I have been reading together in the evenings, so I haven't been taking the time to go verse by verse on here. I should, though. My own thought processes are good for me. It's good to read alone, and think, and decide where I stand, rather than have someone else's input all of the time. Of course, if you are reading with a prayer, I'm sure the Spirit has plenty of input in that "conversation"!

Now, to get myself back on track, I believe I will read a chapter. I owe it to myself, don't I? Plus, it's Christmas time, and where should my mind be centered? Right here. In the scriptures.

4 Wherefore, I would that ye should remember that I have spoken unto you concerning that prophet which the Lord showed unto me, that should baptize the Lamb of God, which should take away the sins of the world.
5 And now, if the Lamb of God, he being holy, should have need to be baptized by water, to fulfil all righteousness, O then, how much more need have we, being unholy, to be baptized, yea, even by water!
6 And now, I would ask of you, my beloved brethren, wherein the Lamb of God did fulfil all righteousness in being baptized by water?
7 Know ye not that he was holy? But notwithstanding he being holy, he showeth unto the children of men that, according to the flesh he humbleth himself before the Father, and witnesseth unto the Father that he would be obedient unto him in keeping his commandments.
8 Wherefore, after he was baptized with water the Holy Ghost descended upon him in the form of a dove.
9 And again, it showeth unto the children of men the straitness of the path, and the narrowness of the gate, by which they should enter, he having set the example before them.
10 And he said unto the children of men: Follow thou me. Wherefore, my beloved brethren, can we follow Jesus save we shall be willing to keep the commandments of the Father?
11 And the Father said: Repent ye, repent ye, and be baptized in the name of my Beloved Son.
12 And also, the voice of the Son came unto me, saying: He that is baptized in my name, to him will the Father give the Holy Ghost, like unto me; wherefore, follow me, and do the things which ye have seen me do.
(Book of Mormon | 2 Nephi 31:4 - 12)

This section of scripture is packed full of wonderful question starters for me. And answers.
The first thing that catches my attention is the obvious need for baptism by immersion. I read all too often of how it "just isn't necessary anymore" or "a sprinkling is symbolic". I really don't think it cuts it. Honestly. The scriptures say to follow the Savior, they say he was PURE and not in need of baptism, but was baptized to SHOW US how it is to be done. I don't believe we truly understand all the laws of God (Heaven knows I am confused right now as to how Moses kills a guy, becomes a fugitive, and then is called as a prophet...I have SO many questions to ask when I die), but I think the Christ was pretty explicit in this whole baptism thing. Honestly, if anyone out there can tell me the reasons they don't think they need baptism (by immersion, by someone with priesthood authority)to be saved, I'd love to hear it, because I cannot see it myself when I read the scriptures.

Second. I have a HUGE beef with the whole God & Jesus & the Holy Ghost are the same guy. In the scriptures above, (and in the Bible, since I realize that some reading this may not accept the Book of Mormon as scripture. That's fine, we'll use
15 And Jesus answering said unto him, Suffer it to be so now: for thus it becometh us to fulfil all righteousness. Then he suffered him.
16 And Jesus, when he was baptized, went up straightway out of the water: and, lo, the heavens were opened unto him, and he saw the Spirit of God descending like a dove, and lighting upon him:
17 And lo a voice from heaven, saying, This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.
(New Testament | Matthew 3:15 - 17))

Is Christ throwing his voice? Descending upon himself? Yes, I know there are scriptures that say that the Father & Son are one, but I've been thinking. There are also scriptures that say that "If ye are not one ye are not mine", but even as we as a people become "one" we do not become a huge being of one mass. I'm still me, you are still you. Jesus is Jesus, Heavenly Father is Heavenly Father.

I must add that this is not something I started believing after being baptized into the LDS church. As a small girl, I had a hard time praying to a "being". I started imaging a loving father that would sit & listen to me. I saw him as separate from Jesus, who I learned of & felt indebted to. When the LDS doctrine was introduced to me, even though I'd been living in a Catholic household, the doctrine of them being three separate, distinct beings was not foreign to me.

This belief also makes it easier for me to pray. I feel heard, if you will. I feel like it is a conversation, not just a floating head dissertation. I'm not giving a soliloquy, I'm talking to my creator--a God who I love.

A Dream

So, this morning, my son came into me with a dream he had. I usually listen half-heartedly (I know, bad mommy), but this morning, I felt very prompted to give him my full attention. Here is what he had to say:
"I had a long dream last night. In my dream superheroes and monsters had to fight. The rule was that if the super heroes won, there would be light, and if the monsters won, there would be dark. The superheroes had to fight with swords, I don't know why. The monsters had to fight with swords, too. At first the superheros were winning, but then the monsters went into a cave and blew it up and rocks came down and the superheroes couldn't get into the cave to fight them. Later, we found that the monsters' plan didn't work, and they had been killed by the cave. There were skulls everywhere. All the monsters, their skulls fell away, but their other parts went to heaven (headless?). All of the superheroes who had died fighting came back to life. It was a happy ending."

I wanted to ask him more, but then he got distracted with acting out a fight scene--he IS five, you know.